“The most important single ingredient in the formula of success is knowing how to get along with people.” 

~ Theodore Roosevelt ~ 

Without people the world would be pretty dull. As a matter of fact, the world would be empty without anyone to enjoy it. Life is about relationships, and relationships are about people. A few months ago I was sitting at Starbucks and I overheard a lady talking about her vacation that was coming up soon. She went on and on about how excited she was to get away from people. The most exciting part of her trip was truly vacating the presence of others. Though I do understand the need to “get away” sometimes, I couldn’t help but think, she must be missing something in her relationships with others. If her relationships were so bad and draining that she just had to get away, something is wrong. Relationships should be life-giving not life-taking. There will always be relationships we may have with others that are draining, but in order to be fulfilled in life  we have to learn the art of relationships. We have to learn how to have life-giving relationships with others. The art of relationships is about connecting with others in a way that brings a mutual reward. It is about seeking win-win relationships that foster encouragement and likeability.

Here are some relational tips that are win-win…

1. Believe In Others

In order to connect with others it has to be genuine. You cannot fake relationships. Author Les Giblin said, “You can’t make the other fellow feel important in your presence if you secretly feel that he is a nobody.” Approach others with an innocent until proven guilty mindset. Believe the best in others. See others as they could be, not just who they are. When you see their potential and their uniqueness it helps you understand them more.

The win-win principle: When you believe in others, they will believe in you! 

2. Speak Highly Of Others

Nothing will destroy your credibility and integrity than speaking poorly of others. Here is a rule to live by: If you are talking about someone behind their back and that person overheard you, would you be embarrassed about what you said? If the answer is yes, you probably shouldn’t be saying what you are saying. Whenever I hear someone speak poorly of others to me, I can’t help but think that person will probably do the same to others about me. However, when you speak highly of others it is fruitful. It honors others and lifts them to a higher level.

The win-win principle: When you speak highly of others, they will speak highly of you!

3. Listen To Others

One of the best ways to connect with someone else is to truly care about their needs and likes. When you get someone talking about the things they love, they will not keep silent. People love to talk about the things they care about, so listen. Part of being a people person is the ability to connect with who they are not who you are. Don’t expect people to connect with you first, you have to take the initiative and connect with them. They way you connect with others is to value them by listening. Not many people want to listen to you go and on doing all the talking, they want someone who will value their opinions and thoughts. If you truly want to connect with others give them a voice by listening to them.

The win-win principle: When you listen to others, they will listen to you!