Please read Project F6 = Faith before you read this post if you haven’t already…

Family is THE most important thing you have in life outside of a relationship with God.  Friends will come and go, but family is with you forever.  The one constant relationship you will always have is the one with your family.  Our family should be the first priority of our time.  Unfortunately many families only get the left-overs of the day.  Family time should be a sacred zone in our life.  It is funny how quick we are to schedule a meeting with others, say yes to opportunities, and not be late to work, yet treat our family with less than half of the same commitment.  If we are going to receive the blessing and benefit of a great family then we have to give it our greatest time.

Be the leader of your home, don’t let Hollywood or Nickelodeon lead it.  Set up times and opportunities in your home for Godly things to happen.  Don’t forget God when you are at home.  Here is a good way to look at your family time.  Make your T.I.M.E.…

T = Thematic.  Don’t try to do everything under the sun every time you are together.  Rally behind an idea or an event.  Spread things out into different nights.  If you are going to a movie together then do something that goes along with the movie, like eating dinner at a restaurant where the movie takes place.  Or maybe if you are going to a baseball game, get jerseys or make your own.  These are fun little things you can do to bring about a theme to your time.  If you are taking your spouse out on a date, theme it out and make it special.  Recreate your first date, do something creative.

I = Intentional.  Life is not automatic.  You have to be intentional about the things you want to do.  If left on auto-pilot, things will always crash.  Strategically spend your time.  Plan out the time you spend so that you get the most out of it.  Think through the details and make it happen.  Don’t wait for family time to happen because it won’t, you have to take time to make time.  Go through your schedule for the week and carve out time with your family and protect that time the way you would a business meeting.

M = Memorable.  Do things together that will build long lasting memories with your family.  Take your spouse out on dates that you will cherish together.  Do things with your kids that will make an impact.  Memories are seeds of potential that God uses to teach us.  As you make memories it will bind you together more and more.  The biggest reason for divorce is the feeling that couples have that their lives are going in separate directions.  Talk about your memories together.   It reminds us of how much we enjoy being together.  My wife and I watch home videos, look at pictures with our kids, and talk about trips we have made.  They will never forget those special times together because we keep it fresh.

E = Encouraging.  Fan the flames of your families dreams and gifts.  Don’t be a dream killer, be a dream giver.  There is nothing worse than someone who, in the name of reality, always tells you how it can’t be done.  Spend time together that is encouraging and lifts each other up.  Shine light into your family, not darkness.  Parents sometimes can destroy kids aspirations by being sarcastic.  Sarcasm comes from the Greek word… Sarkasmos, meaning to to tear flesh, gnash the teeth, speak bitterly.  Why in the world would we want to tear our kids apart in the name of trying to be funny or sarcastic? Build your family up and speak life over them.

Deuteronomy 6:5-9

 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.  These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts.  Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.  Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.  Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Get a map for your family and live it out.  Here are some ideas for your Family Map…

Project F6

Family

Purpose: Being a great spouse and a great parent

Question: Am I investing into my family? 

First, take out a piece of paper and write “Family” at the top, and then put a circle around it.  Now, using one word, write down a sub-category that you feel is the most important under the banner of family (see examples below).  Put a circle around that word and draw a line connecting this circle with the Family circle.  You can have as many sub-categories as you want, but don’t go too overboard for now.  Better to start small and work your way up to more later.  For example…my sub-categories for Family are…

Family

– Erin

– Zion

– Allie

– Goals 

Now that you have taken the time to map out the sub-categories that are most important under Family, take it one step further.  Under each sub-category begin to write down the things that will help you accomplish these areas.  For example, my things are…

Erin

– Dates

– Spiritual Growth 

– Dreams

Allie 

– Dates

– Love Language

Zion

– Dates

– Love Language 

Goals

– Trips 

– Family Nights 

– Devotions 

You can continue to break down each category into action steps to help you define what you are going to do in each area.  For example…

Erin

Dates

– Dinner & Movie (just an old fashion dinner and movie out together)

– Creative Dates (themed nights, memorable places, surprise trips, etc…)

Spiritual Growth

– Books (reading together, bible study, etc…)

– Pray (spending time together praying for our family and each other)

Dreams

– (Making sure I fan the dreams and goals in Erin’s life)

Take time to think through and write out your Family Map.

Tomorrow we will map out “FUN”…